Advocate For Unfairness...
...and other
commencement advice for graduates by P.J. O'Rourke in the LA Times Opinion column.
Here are some excerpts, but you'll want to read the whole thing. It's really quite good advice for everyone, not just young graduates.
1. Go out and make a bunch of money!
Here we are living in the world's most prosperous country, surrounded by all the comforts, conveniences and security that money can provide. Yet no American political, intellectual or cultural leader ever says to young people, "Go out and make a bunch of money." Instead, they tell you that money can't buy happiness. Maybe, but money can rent it.
There's nothing the matter with honest moneymaking. Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino's box. In a free society, with the rule of law and property rights, no one loses when someone else gets rich.
Well as I always say: Money can't buy happiness, it sure can help you look in a lot more places. It is my belief that income disparity is created by two things. Our progressive tax system and welfare. As long as you take enough from the wealthy to keep the lowest class comfortable they are happy to stay in that state. Remove that incentive (except for the very needy that cannot work or are mentally challenged) and people will provide for themselves.
2. Don't be an idealist!
Don't chain yourself to a redwood tree. Instead, be a corporate lawyer and make $500,000 a year. No matter how much you cheat the IRS, you'll still end up paying $100,000 in property, sales and excise taxes. That's $100,000 to schools, sewers, roads, firefighters and police. You'll be doing good for society. Does chaining yourself to a redwood tree do society $100,000 worth of good?
Idealists are also bullies. The idealist says, "I care more about the redwood trees than you do. I care so much I can't eat. I can't sleep. It broke up my marriage. And because I care more than you do, I'm a better person. And because I'm the better person, I have the right to boss you around."
Get a pair of bolt cutters and liberate that tree.
Who does more for the redwoods and society anyway -- the guy chained to a tree or the guy who founds the "Green Travel Redwood Tree-Hug Tour Company" and makes a million by turning redwoods into a tourist destination, a valuable resource that people will pay just to go look at?
So make your contribution by getting rich. Don't be an idealist.
I'll have to agree and disagree someone on this one. Making money takes a certain amount of idealism. However his point is well taken that too much idealism misdirected is counter-productive.
3. Get politically uninvolved!
All politics stink. Even democracy stinks. Imagine if our clothes were selected by the majority of shoppers, which would be teenage girls. I'd be standing here with my bellybutton exposed. Imagine deciding the dinner menu by family secret ballot. I've got three kids and three dogs in my family. We'd be eating Froot Loops and rotten meat.
But let me make a distinction between politics and politicians. Some people are under the misapprehension that all politicians stink. Impeach George W. Bush, and everything will be fine. Nab Ted Kennedy on a DUI, and the nation's problems will be solved.
But the problem isn't politicians -- it's politics. Politics won't allow for the truth. And we can't blame the politicians for that. Imagine what even a little truth would sound like on today's campaign trail:
"No, I can't fix public education. The problem isn't the teachers unions or a lack of funding for salaries, vouchers or more computer equipment The problem is your kids!"
Truth in politics, what a novel idea. But honesty will never fly. Besides the people know politicians lie and want them to do so, and will defend the lies to the bitter end. Visiting any forum that discusses political news will easily convince you of that.
4. Forget about fairness!
We all get confused about the contradictory messages that life and politics send.
Life sends the message, "I'd better not be poor. I'd better get rich. I'd better make more money than other people." Meanwhile, politics sends us the message, "Some people make more money than others. Some are rich while others are poor. We'd better close that 'income disparity gap.' It's not fair!"
Well, I am here to advocate for unfairness. I've got a 10-year-old at home. She's always saying, "That's not fair." When she says this, I say, "Honey, you're cute. That's not fair. Your family is pretty well off. That's not fair. You were born in America. That's not fair. Darling, you had better pray to God that things don't start getting fair for you." What we need is more income, even if it means a bigger income disparity gap.
Which makes number 1 about making money all important. We either stay at the bottom and live partially off the rich, or make enough to at least be middle class. Of course the more you make the better as most of us realize. In fact so many people realize it that the middle class is shrinking. The progressives will tell you that this income disparity is bad, but nothing could be farther from the truth.
Life is about freedom, and as a late online acquaintance of mine used to say:
"Liberty and equality are incompatible, since liberty means diversity while equality means uniformity. Free men are not equal and equal men are not free."