I couldn't wait. I hadn't planted a garden in years. Dutifully I prepared the soil with compost, fertilizers, and ingredients to help the soil hold moisture for the long haul.
The tiller I rented worked well except for the patch of clay that bogged it down. My back was intact and the next day I put out the plants and set the seed.
The dry season caused my water bill to rise but I was determined to see this through. My early blooming tomatoes were budding little orbs on each plant and they were going to be right on time.
When I was an elementary age I would sit out in the middle of Mom's garden, salt shaker in hand and gorge myself on what is now “Heirloom” type tomatoes. They were juicy and tart. Not like the pasty red fruit of today.
My children might not ever know what a joy that was if I don't harvest the “Heirlooms” in the first row.
One day I noticed my plants were losing their fruit. I found 20 of them on my deck in half eaten state.
Those damn squirrels! I used to feed them when I was much younger. I thought they had a cute face and fluffy, squishy tail. I realized that the huge oak trees and 80 foot pecan tree had attracted an overabundance of fuzzy mammals.
They can't have my crop! That is all there is to it. What to do?
Being armed with an air gun, poison, bow & arrow or slingshot sounded sweet to me but got the “hairy eyeball” look from the wife and girls..
Squirrels are a protected specie. There are specific seasons you can shoot them. Big fine and jail sentence for hunting without a license.
I have to have a new plan as the garden is on it's last legs.
I trucked down to the farm store. For $29.99 s live trap could be had and I could take those rascals to animal control. Hehehe
A small square of foil and a dollop of Skippy peanut butter and the plot thickened.
In 20 minutes I had my first inmate and two others clawing at the cage from the outside trying to get my peanut butter or maybe release their buddy.
I called animal control. They want me to bring my cage in and leave it as the officer will not remove a mad squirrel at the resident's home. The officer told me they would just release the beady eyed tree rat in the park on Parker Street. Wait a minute...that is only a few blocks from my house. I had heard that squirrels will go several miles to get back home. Maybe Animal Rescue will have an idea.
I found another 40 tomatoes strewn around my yard. Good thing I planted those 40 plants. Those creatures won't be able to keep up with the main crop.
Ring....Ringgggg....Rin...”Hello Animal Rescue, How may I help you?”
“Hi, I have a problem with squirrels invading my garden. I have captured one of the offending rodents and wondered if you had a place I could bring it.?
“Well Sir, Have you considered just letting him out? After all all he is doing is feeding and aren't these creatures amazing? Did you see the show the other night on the Animal channel that spotlighted how wonderful these...Suddenly the phone was somehow disconnected on my end. I guess in the excitement my finger had somehow hit the off button. Oh Well
The wife and daughters had the saddest look on their face when I mentioned that I might not follow the law on harvesting one of God's ugliest most unworthy animals. To stop a revolt or one of them throwing themselves on the live trap, I opted to take the little cutie up to my wooded investment property and release it. 20 miles from the house and a with a very large river in between. The man who had built adjacent to my land was always complaining about the lack of mowing in my small open space next to the woods. He didn't understand the natural look.
Why hadn't I thought of this before? There are plentiful oak trees and a small river nearby. A win-win situation. I could also enhance my wonderful neighbor's life too. You know... the one with the grass ruler n his pocket. It looks like he is planting a garden this year Hehehe
Ultimately I hauled 26 squirrels, 2 possums, a couple of rabbits but released the 2 cats and one crow in my yard.
Needless to say, I got nary a tomato that year, 3 peppers, no carrots, hardly any beans. I did manage to secure some rosemary and thyme that the four legged eating machines didn't seem to care for. Their little tummies were undoubtedly too full when they got to that row.
My garden cost me a couple hundred, the gas to haul them in my guzzling pick up even more.
My wife and daughters did get to taste the Heirloom tomatoes though. They weren't wild about them. I paid and arm and leg for them at the Farmer's market.
Fast forward to 2007. Youtube has a great video. An person with a great sense of humor and much smarter than I am invented the perfect tool.












